Rape is forced sex. Loving sex is genuinely consensual. He says she agrees in her sleep. If a couple wants to stay together in spite of an incident or pattern of marital rape, a couples therapist can help partners heal the hurts and develop a healthy way to be sexual with each other. This should be obvious. It is a way that two people who love each other express love and caring and communicate tenderness. Wives do not belong to their husbands. Retrieved on August 12, , from https: But it is rape nonetheless.
Sex when the wife feels threatened. Sex when the woman feels she has no choice. She does love him. She has been in a conflicted marriage for years. Anna is a woman in her 40s. These women are all married. She feels she has no say about when and where she and her husband will have sex. But if the husband refuses to take responsibility for inflicting emotional and physical pain and even feels justified in his actions, it may be that the only way for the wife to stop it is to leave. Her husband is demanding sex despite the fact that it is inconvenient and not welcomed. The woman becomes a hostage in her own home. If a couple wants to stay together in spite of an incident or pattern of marital rape, a couples therapist can help partners heal the hurts and develop a healthy way to be sexual with each other. But it is rape nonetheless. She can only comply rather than risk being harmed either physically or emotionally. Kayla is being physically hurt by the person who says he loves her. He is getting off. Married sex, like all intimate, loving sex is consensual. She is getting violated. Sex should be based on respect, equality, consent, caring, and clear communication. It is not one of the following situations: But often, anger, disappointments and the emotional hurts that are the result of forced marital sex are so intense that it takes some specialized treatment to heal the relationship. It is a way that two people who love each other express love and caring and communicate tenderness. It may be frightening for the wife to cut loose, especially if she is financially and emotionally dependent on her husband. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. Like many hostages, she gives up and gives in to whatever he wants — including sex. But some men have the mistaken idea that marriage changes the rules. He says she agrees in her sleep. Some men keep themselves in a position of superiority by controlling all the money, by making contact with friends and family difficult to impossible, or by making sure there is no way for her to get transportation out of the house.
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